"Ta Guele!": A lesson in French with a difference!
March 30, 2017
At Hobbywhores #3, Laura Garland took us on a whirlwind tour of France, teaching us all the swearwords you could ever dream of knowing.
Laura has been teaching French since 2009 when she set up Fleur de Lys Tuition, aimed at helping Francophiles realise their linguistic potential whilst booze cruising around Brittany, and providing endless conjugation support for exasperated exam candidates. Laura has more degrees than we have had jäger bombs and is the very proud owner of a one and a half stone Manx cat. Our brief from Hobbywhores was pretty simple: we want to swear in French, get the ride in French and order carbs/wine in French. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Les Gross Mots
Chier (To Shit)
Ta Guele! (Fuck up your mouth!)
We also learned some weird French idioms:
"Avoir un petit vélo dans la tête."
What does it mean?: To have a small bicycle in the head
What does it really mean?: To have a screw loose
"Il ne peigne pas le cou de la giraffe."
What does it mean?: He doesn’t comb the neck of the giraffe
What does it really mean?: He doesn’t fart around
But our favourites by far were...
"Anglais ont debarqués."
What does it mean?: The English have disembarked
What does it really mean?: To have your period
"Mettre le petit Jésus dans la crèche."
What does it mean?: To put little Jesus in the crèche
What does it really mean?: To have sex
And Laura brought PRIZES. WE LOVE PRIZES. Here is Diana modelling some of said prizes - hand-painted golden onions and a magical foam baguette.
If you want to learn some French, sweary or otherwise, you can contact Laura via Fleur De Lys Tuition. Merci beaucoup Laura!